The end of the school year and the days of printable sbac practice test are approaching. During this period, support and understanding from parents is more important than ever for a child. But we’re not all psychologists by nature, right? How do you support a child before an exam?
“You’ll do fine, because you’re a smart kid!”
What could seem to be easier? You don’t have to make up long farewell speeches, just walk up, give your child a hug and let him know that you believe in him. It’s important to explain why you think so in order to convince the graduate that you can do it. “You have been preparing diligently all year, and at school you did similar assignments. They won’t invent anything new on the exams. You’ll do fine, because you did everything you could to prepare!”
“I really hated exams in school!”
Don’t look at high school anxiety as unnecessary self-inflicted anxiety. For you, who have been through these tests for a long time, the exam is not a problem at all. So it’s important to remember how you went through the final tests, put yourself in your son’s (daughter’s) shoes. Tell me what you didn’t like most about the exams and how you handled the excitement. “Can you imagine, I didn’t like exams in school either, and I was terribly nervous! So the evening before the test, my girlfriends and I would get together for a tea break. We ate sweets, shared emotions – in general, prepared ourselves mentally for the next day. And, of course, we repeated tickets together.”
“Tell me, what are you afraid of?”
Sometimes a student is afraid not of the numerical dyslexia test themselves, but of what will happen IF… Ask what your child is afraid of, and talk about how you can resolve these scary situations if they suddenly happen. For example, a schoolboy is afraid of getting less than seven points in Belarusian history, because it is a major subject, and then he will “mess up” his diploma. How do you solve such a situation? Explain that it’s very difficult to know all the tickets perfectly, and the exam is essentially like roulette. Someone will be lucky to draw his lucky ticket, and someone will be scared if he gets an undesirable question. But it’s not the end of the world. So we’ll apply to another college (university). And if we manage to write a good CT and get a decent passing score, then you can close your eyes to the six or seven.
“We love you and will love you regardless of your grades.”
Probably one of the most needed supportive phrases any student wants to hear. The “love a child for something” stance is destructive to a child’s psyche. This is where psychological problems, fears and neuroses come from. For a child to feel confident and not afraid of exams, tell him about your love as often as possible.
“Happiness is not defined by grades.”
Explain to your child that an exam is just a little episode in life. Which will soon be forgotten, because his place will be taken by college or university studies, new friends, work and so on. Make it clear that the search for yourself does not end with a diploma from university. Often people, after graduation, change their minds and retrain. For example, after two college degrees become a massage therapist. And why were the high grades in economic theory or economic law? The profession of a masseur made a person happier, and the study at the universities was a stage of self-discovery. In the pursuit of grades, the main thing is not to forget your own interests.
“Winning is not just about being the best.”
Every student has different abilities: some are good at math, while others have an easier time with spelling. And that doesn’t mean your child should get straight A’s in all subjects. All kids are different. Winning isn’t about being the best of the rest, it’s about being the best version of yourself. If a kid knows a subject with a steady seven, what’s to ask for a ten?
Of course, we don’t limit parents with this list of phrases. Each of you knows your child better and how to support him in a difficult moment. The main thing is to help your child conquer his fears, gain confidence, and pass the serious tests without worry or stress.